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แต่เท่าที่รู้หากข้าพเจ้าพินิจพวกมันดู ข้าพเจ้ารู้สึกได้ถึงความเกี่ยวเกาะเลื้อยรัดกับรยางค์หนึ่งรยางค์ใดของต้นไม้แห่งชีวิตของข้าพเจ้า-ไม่มากกว่าประทับใจ ไม่น้อยกว่าหยดน้ำตา

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ภาพสายตาเช่นที่ดำเนินอยู่ เสียงครืนครั่นของปัจจัยรอบตัวดั่งเสียงหวีดเหวยกรีดร้องของหม้อน้ำเดือด แผดทะลวงทุกเยื่อใน สัมผัสรุนแรงยื้อกระชากผิวหนังเหมือนสงครามแห่งมนุษย์สวาปามคน ทั้งหลายนั้นพุ่งตรงเดือดพล่านมาหาข้าพเจ้า-โอ มันช่างดุดันเหลือเกิน มิพักต้องรวทถึงความมืดสีหม่นที่แผ่อำนาจทั้งพื้นที่และกาลเวลาเอาไว้ดั่งปีศาจทุนนิยมที่กัดกินใจเราอยู่ ณ ตอนนี้-เหี้ยมเกรียม มุ่งมั่น ไม่หยุด กว่าจะเห็นความตาย

ทำไมข้าพเจ้ารูู้็้สึกถึงทำนองรื่นไหล มิใช่แยซซ์ มิใช่บลูส์ (หรืออาจเป็นทั้งสอง) มิใช่ปาร์คเกอร์(ชาลี), ฟิตซ์เจอรัลด์(เอลลา) และหรือ มิใช่ โรเบิร์ต ยอห์นสัน มิใช่บี บี คิง แต่มันหนักหน่วงแบบอินดัสเทรียล-แมนสัน (มาริลีน) ซึ่งภายในความหยาบกร้าน มันแฝงฝังด้วยท่วงทำนองโสดาบันบอสซ่า กิลแบร์โต้(แอสตรูด) ในคำร้องโน้มถ่วงเช่นแรงดึงดูด ของเสต็ก ที โบน เนื้อสันก้อนใหญ่ของผู้ใฝ่หาสุนทรียะ

ความรู้สึกเช่นว่า-ความรู้สึกในแขนงเทวีสาวและซาตานผู้ สังวาสกันอย่างร้อนพระอาฑิตย์ แดงเลือดอิรักบริสุทธ์เงื้อมจงอยปากอินทรีย์บ้าน้ำมัน แต่สวยงามอ่อนโยนยิ่งกว่าเธอผู้ที่ข้าพเจ้ารัก-ไม่มากและไม่น้อยกว่านี้ในนามของความงามทางโลกส่วนตน
สงบกว่าการนึกถึงโดยไม่ถึงความว่างเปล่า-ปรมาจารย์แห่งเซนกำหนด โดยข้าพเจ้ากำหนัดรู้


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หนึ่งในความน่าจะเป็น-ข้าไม่แน่ใจในตัวเองอีกแล้ว หนึ่งในความน่าจะเป็น-ข้าพเจ้าหวาดกลัว หนึ่งในความน่าจะเป็น-ข้าพเจ้าตรมทุกข์ระดับลึกที่สุดในขนาด โน แมน'ส แลนด์ หนึ่งในความน่าจะเป็น-ข้าพเจ้าขุดตนลึกหยั่งรู้สิ่งแท้เที่ยงไม่ผัน หนึ่งในความน่าจะเป็น-ข้าพเจ้ากำลังพิกาฬหฤหรรษ์ หนึ่งในความน่าจะเป็น-ปัจจุบัน,อนาคต,อดีตสลายไป

ทั้งหลายน่าจะเป็น...

แต่อะไรคือสิ่งที"่เป็น"ข้าพเจ้าไม่ทราบซ่านสดับ แม้จะเห็นคำตอบ แต่ไร้การรู้ สัมผัสไม่ได้ ขาดด้วนการอธิบายพรรณนาถึงมัน จนกว่ารูปธรรมจะเผยตัวในสายตา แต่ความไม่แน่ใจยังมีต่อไปว่า ตาข้าพเจ้าพร่าเลือนหรือ ข้าพเจ้ามิได้ใช้จามองอีกต่อไป ข้าพเจ้าไม่แน่ใจว่าข้าพเจ้าชาชินกับสิ่งเร้าทุบจิตใจ(แต่มิได้หยุดความเสียหาย) หรือ ตัวเรือนกายข้าพเ้จาสลายสมานนรกสวรรค์โลกกัปกัลป์

อีกไม่นาน ในขนาดเวลาสันขวานของชีวิตมนุษย์สถุลรสเช่นข้าพเจ้า ข้าพเจ้าคงรู้ผลแห่งมัน...

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